Big events when you have overwhelming anxiety..
If you're reading this then you too may struggle with anxiety. To some degree, we all do from time to time, it's normal, but some of us experience it on a whole other level to the point it can feel crippling.
I know it well and if you do too, know that I got you. I feel you, I see you and I hear you. It doesn't always have to feel like this.
In the moment, I know anxiety can feel like it's eating you alive and that you will never feel good or excited about things ever again, but that isn't true, I know it because I've been through it and can safely say that you might still get anxious, but it doesn't have to rule your life or stop you from doing fun things, going to those parties, weddings etc. It's possible and it's possible to enjoy it too.
We can't let fear control us and stop us from enjoying and making memories in life.
I know in the past few years I have continued to push myself out of my comfort zone (with compassion) yes things still felt hard, I still had my doubts and worry, but I knew most of it was irrational, I know that doesn't take away how it makes you feel internally, but there are ways to ease this.
As they say, "life begins at the end of your comfort zone"
I feel it's important for me as a coach to share about my struggles too and how I navigate through them.
I'm not about sugar coating anything or pretending like everything is perfect, because it's not, that's not how life works.
However, this doesn't mean to say that we can't be happy, have fun or lead a fulfilling and content life, because we absolutely can!!!
Recently I have had events and have events to come all which do make me feel quite anxious.
At heart I'm a huge introvert, so huge social gatherings naturally make me feel a bit uneasy.
The easiest thing to do would be to say no, to not go, but then I miss out on special occasions and special moments with the people that I love.
And that's a pretty miserable life to be living (if you can call it living)..
This weekend just gone I had been invited to a wedding of 2 amazing friends of mine. Naturally of COURSE I wanted to be there and celebrate their big day with them, however, this wasn't your typical wedding (didn't expect anything less tbh) it was them all over!
This was an entire weekend of a wedding event Friday - Sunday
Not in some fancy spa hotel, nope, it was on a barn on the border of Wales and we were staying in yurts on a field.
No luxurious ensuites, we had a communal toilet block instead.
You might be thinking "not for me" and I can understand that, but this wasn't what it was about, it was all about having fun, being with the people they cherish most and making beautiful memories.
At first I thought "I don't know if I can do this" if it was a day I could possibly do it, but staying 2 nights freaked me out.
It meant sharing a yurt, on a field, in the middle of nowhere with 4 other girls I didn't know.
Saying no was too easy, so what did I do instead?
I spoke up about how I was feeling, I spoke to people involved so that we could put things in place to make me feel more comfortable and reassured about the whole event.
This isn't being fussy or hard work, it's about doing what you need to do for you in order for you to feel comfortable whilst being able to thoroughly enjoy yourself and be in the moment.
Rather than going anyway and spending your entire time worrying and being in your head because you felt too afraid to say anything, it makes so much more sense to just tell someone how you're feeling so that they can help you in any way that they can.
So did I go?
You bet I did!!
And did I enjoy it?
It was amazing! I am so glad that I went, but I am also incredibly proud that I spoke up and put things in place to make me feel more comfortable.
I danced, I jumped on the bouncy castle with the bride in her wedding dress, I shared a yurt with 4 other amazing women, I socialised in a large group, I took part in all of it.
If you're reading this thinking "I have missed out on so many amazing events and ceremonies due to anxiety and fear" then I got you.
But it's possible to overcome this, totally possible and you CAN have an amazing time too.
Anxiety is a bitch and it can rear its ugly head at any point, but there are ways to manage it in ways that feel right to you.
And I teach all of these things inside Embrace & Embody my 8 week group programme for women wanting reclaim their power, themselves and their life in order to feel fulfilled confident and at peace with life.
If you want to know more and join this incredibly supportive container of like minded women, use the link below to my FREE masterclass happening on 18th September at 7pm (BST) and I'll see you on the other side 😍